• Joey Butrus

How to Order Drinks like a Grown-Up

Updated: Jan 15


Congratulations. You are now a functioning member of society. You have left school and are officially joining the workforce. Unfortunately, every alcoholic drink you order is still a crap beer, vodka cran, Jack and Coke, or a frozen marg. Sorry to throw shade so quickly, but it’s time to ditch the 'cheap and effective' mentality you used to drag around in college. Drinking is no longer something you do exclusively with your squad. Since alcohol consumption does exist outside of college towns, it's important to note that it looks differently based on the occasion and your drink order should vary accordingly. With the large variety of drink options, how do you narrow down what to order? Well, it's as simple as looking at your outfit. With these rules, you'll leave all your colleagues admiring your taste.

On my Suit and Tie

Formal attire for a wedding, ball or nice event will limit you to the classy cocktails and wine. If you enjoy sipping straight liquor without wincing, this is always a safe and classy move. A few classy cocktails we recommend are the Martini, Old Fashioned, Manhattan, Moscow Mule or a classic daiquiri. The key is to keep it simple so try to avoid drinks that are pink or green. If it's a black-tie event, these simple drinks are sure to impress and leave you savoring every sip.


Out of Office

Business attire gives you back all the clear drinks and a few other classics that got cut out of formal attire. Beer is back but for any networking events, stick to craft beer in bottles or beer on draft. In situations where coworkers may be around, be mindful of what the name of the beer is. Walking around drinking an Arrogant Bastard may cause some brows to raise. For cocktails, safe options include a Gin and Tonic, Margarita on the Rocks, Dark and Stormy, or Vodka soda with whatever flavor addition floats your boat. Similarly to formal attire, avoid the bright pink or other unusual colors.


In-between

If the attire is between dressing up to leave the house and business casual, your favorite basic drinks back. These staples are placed down on the list because, ideally, they are being drunk in low-pressure environments. You aren't trying to impress anyone and your drink of choice matches this mentality. The unimpressive refreshments include the Whiskey/Rum and Coke, mainstream light beers, Piña Coladas, and of course, the trusty screwdriver. The Long Island Iced Tea is tricky. Although it is seemingly more sophisticated, it can be overpowering. With a laundry list of alcoholic ingredients, this is a drink that you must tread lightly with. However, if you're out with a group of friends you can go ahead and celebrate in classic form with a frozen Margarita. Now on to the haymakers!


Indecent

The final installment will be simply called indecent. This is when your attire consists of your favorite t-shirt with any pants (optional) or when you're with friends and it’s a good ole' fashioned throw down. Let yourself loose and resort to baser instincts! Although some argue that shots are for kids binging, we'd like to argue that they occasionally belong in the hands of friends. If you're feeling up to it, break out that margarita machine you haven’t used since college and enjoy the alcoholic ice slurry while hiding out in your blankets. White Claws and bendy straws, the world is your oyster and you are free to do as you please. Let the good times roll!

With these guidelines in mind, go out with friends and try some drinks from each category. When it's time to make a good impression at a fancy event, you'll be able to order proudly and watch the nods of approval.

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