5 Red Flags That You Might Let Slide in a Relationship
You know that feeling you get when you thought that one person was going to be your one person for the rest of your life? We understand that feeling all too well. But, here's something to think about: was it truly a dream come true or did you get comfortable with that person's nonsense so you settled because you were afraid of being alone?
We're not here to call you out about your experiences, however, we are here to provide some insight into the world of red flags that might save you time (and heartbreak) in the future. Red Flags can be such a nuisance because you can become stuck with tolerating the situation or dipping out as soon as possible. The saying "love is blind” sometimes really translates to “I’ll let you slide" -- trust us, at the end of this blog, you’ll understand what we're talking about. We must learn how to put our foot down and manifest the love that we deserve!
Go ahead and grab your wine, tea, or water and let's dive into the five red flags that you might be experiencing and swiping under the rug.
1. Phone Facing Down
This is a big red alert if it's happening more often than not. You might be thinking, they must be into me to the point where they want no distractions! Let us politely burst your bubble. This could be one of two things. They are either used to having privacy or they could be hiding something. Nine times out of ten when the date’s phone is face down this person does not want you to see what is happening in that phone of theirs.
The moment you see this and feel a certain way, start to take note of their mannerisms when it comes to their cellular device. If one has nothing to hide the phone would be face up and they would still be into you as you thought they were but once you see that phone face down, you might want to face another person at this point. Having a conversation addressing this could easily clear things up, but if bae has an issue you know what might be happening.
2. Titles Do Not Exist
This one is a pretty good tell-all sign. Have you ever had a conversation about getting serious with someone and potentially taking the relationship to the next level, then you get hit with "I don't care about titles" or "I just want to take things slow and find a deeper connection first"? Yeah, they probably aren't looking for commitment. And chances are they might play around and hold onto you until they find someone worth taking that leap of faith - know your worth.
So, if you know you want to be in a serious relationship with a title, do not fall for this red flag. But if you are down to go with the flow with someone then this does not apply to you.
3. Vibes Are Off
It's important to trust your instinct to identify a threat but we wouldn't suggest necessarily trusting your instincts to determine your response. If you feel a shift in vibes or actions when you're around that person, you are not delusional. This could include feeling anxious or uncomfortable when something doesn't feel right or something feels off. Don't jump to conclusions. Take a step back with a clear mind and analyze what could possibly be happening, then take action on it.
In this situation, it's important to protect your peace of mind. Ultimately, you have the option to either address it or continue to get your spirit disrupted.
4. White Lies & Broken Promises
These factors are extremely bad for trust. If you aren't creating a solid foundation that promotes honesty and following through with promises, then it will be a pretty bumpy journey that might not end in your favor.
Look out for certain red flags in the other person; do they rush into something without thinking, are they keeping their word with small tasks, do they throw the word promise around like it's nothing? Pay attention to underlying tones of serial monogamy and narcissism. If you come across this, we hope those sirens are ringing!
5. Wanting to Change Who You Are
We love to hear compliments from our person of interest, but when you constantly hear critiques and/or suggestions like “I like it better when you (insert the disrespect)”, it might be time to purge the negativity and find someone who loves you for you. If you aren't accepted for who you are, then you have no reason being there.
We're not saying to jump to conclusions, sometimes the other person could mean well. Take a moment to really think about what was just said. Were they putting you down or were you hearing what they said through your own self-negative filter? Either way, know yourself and know your worth. Everything else will fall into place.
The only way you will evolve is when you are tired of falling for the same old merry-go-round. Once you are tired of getting your wig, edges, and heart snatched, you will evolve. Once you are tired of going through that same revolving door, you will evolve.
Albert Einstein once said, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”
So my friend, if you are going insane, let’s try something different. Click here for more on red flags.